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Will you be divorced in a year?

187 women and 269 men have answered

Will you be divorced in a year?

  • More men than women are sure they will be married in a year – 72% vs 65%.
  • 13% of women and 10% of men think there is at least a 40% chance they will be divorced a year from now.
  • How serious a woman is about following Jesus had a significant impact on this. In the most serious group 71% are sure they will stay married. In the moderate group 54% are sure. In the least serious group only 36% are sure. 
  • How serious a man is about following Jesus also had an impact on this. In the most serious group 79% are sure they will stay married. In the moderate group 72% are sure. In the least serious group only 35% are sure.
  • Age has some effect for men. Men aged 25-34 were more sure they would stay married, at 81%. Men 45-54 were least sure, at 66%. Men older and younger than 45-54 were about 75% sure.
  • Age had less of an effect on women. Those 25-34 were more sure they would stay married, at 68%. The next age bracket, 35-44 was least sure, at 61%. Women older than that about 64% sure.

Women’s Comments:

  • If you had asked me this 2 yrs ago I would have said 95%. You see, my husband was having an affair. (She is a close co-worker). I had my suspicions but never had proof until one day I followed him to her house. It took me about 6 months to finally get in his face, confront him, and gave him an ultimatum. He confessed. We have been working on our marriage ever since. I still have trust issues, but my marriage is better because I spoke up and didn’t just walk away. IT’S MY MARRIAGE!!!!
  • We’ve made it this far! By the grace of God.
  • Trying to work through his infidelity.
  • We have been thru the trenches of life together. We are devoted soul mates, for life.
  • We’re still working through infidelity on his side, but I believe God’s forgiveness and grace will get us through.
  • I would liked to have selected 1% chance but 5% was closest.
  • My husband and I were counselled before marriage to never consider divorce, but to work out the issues and extend forgiveness and grace to each other. By the power of God and Christ in our hearts and lives, we have a good marriage and continue to love and cherish each other.
  • I was in this place over 12 years ago. (We will celebrate 20 years of marriage this year). Your words were spot on. I had gotten tired of complaining. Was resentful, hurt and done. It ended with an ultimatum that I was firm with (he had to start going to church with me regularly and quit drinking). He did, and the lord grabbed hold of his heart and thus transformed my marriage and the trajectory of our kids’ future. Thank you Jesus!
  • If you’d asked this 10 years ago, my response would have been different. But I did tell my husband I was worried because I’d reached the point where I just didn’t care. That is when he knew there was something big and work needed to be done. Together, we worked hard and it got easier when the kids moved out. Still not perfect, but so much better!!!!
  • We have many issues to work on but made a covenant before the Lord and intend on honoring it. For Better or for Worse.
  • I hesitate to answer any question with an absolute because I don’t know the future, so please understand that my “no chance” answer includes the following: “Extremely small chance, Lord willing. I currently have no desire to be separated from my husband in any way, ever, till death do us part.”
  • Given the ultimatum many times, if I could support my family on my own, I would have been divorced several years ago.
  • I can’t speak for my husband, so my response is from me. If it is up to me we will still be married in a year.
  • Not by my choice. He wants to divorce so he can live as a gay man.
  • There is a high likelihood of my separating this year. I believe I should have done it decades ago but did not out of fear. If he cares maybe it will wake him up. Or, it could just really piss him off and go badly the other way. I definitely do not want a divorce but I cannot live the last years of my life just floating along, circling the drain, as we have lived the last forty together. Please pray for us. I know I have played a part but I have, and continue to seek professional help and God for change and growth and healing in myself. I have grown and changed. He sees no need for that in himself. The healthier me is tired of the games and subtle manipulation and refusal to do anything differently or even calmly discuss things. Something has to go and, if need be, it will be me.
  • I hope and pray we work on our marriage and grow individually. But dealing with his alcoholism is a huge wild card and I don’t know what choices he will make over the next year.
  • We are committed to our marriage. We love each other. We need more hugging, kissing and sex. I am the wife. Husband is asexual. Very kind and giving in. In all other areas. I try to be less sexual. I feel guilty wanting sex when I know he doesn’t need or care about it. He loves me and wants to be with me 24-7. Just not a sexual person. I am , but I am practicing discipline in this area. I hope to be more disciplined over my sexual needs and desires in 2018. It is a daily struggle. I have said I need it like I need food and water. But of course we can Survive without affection and making Love. It is just hard and a discipline I am working on. Not to think sexual thoughts or give in to my bodies desires. It is not easy. But I am much more disciplined about it now. I can’t touch too much or let my body take my mind to thoughts of making love with him. I think of his kindness to me and what I know he would enjoy doing instead. I don’t shower at night as a rule. If I take a shower and go to bed with my husband I want to do wifely things to him. Things he doesn’t care a bit about. So I save my showers for the morning then focus on the many things I should try and accomplish for the day.
  • We should be divorced by now and I’ve been told I should divorce my husband, but as a believer of God’s Word and His promises, I don’t want to divorce my husband. I have been told he won’t change, but I continue to believe he can with the help of the Holy Spirit (even after 22+ years of him not changing). Yes, my husband is also a strong Christian. He knows he is doing wrong and I hope that he will be convicted and change his habits.
  • I do not want a divorce but we just can’t seem to get off the divorce path.
  • I am committed to not divorcing, and so is he. However our marriage has really been struggling for several years.
  • We have been separated for almost 2 years. He was verbally and emotionally abusive, had substance abuse issues, was more interested in porn than me, and has mental health issues. He has addressed none of these issues consistently or for any significant length of time. God said I am free, just fighting to bring things to a legal conclusion.
  • My husband and I are both Christians and we take our vows 32 years ago very seriously. We have had very hard seasons but we never talk about divorce.
  • Still in recovery from his lifelong porn habit, asexual marriage for the last 5 years.
  • How can you estimate such low percentages as 5%? What would that even look like? Maybe we’ll get a divorce if I get bored?
  • One year ago we were in a pretty bad place in our marriage. But we have worked hard on our relationship this past year and now we are stronger than ever before.
  • I am not happy in my marriage. He won’t budge. If I bring it up he makes me pay in some way no matter how prayerfully, carefully, and respectfully I try. But, none of it is “bad enough” for divorce.
  • We both made it clear before marriage that it wasn’t an option. We’ll work through our issues and trust God can restore us if anything goes amiss down the line.
  • He cheated. Numerous times. We are “working on it” but mostly that means I do the hard work, and he tells me how lucky I am that he’s treating me better, and NOW he is a believer; neveryoumind, he’s been pretending to be our whole marriage. A Korean deployment will more than likely lead to more hookers. It’s not looking promising.
  • Yay! Feels great!
  • Both of us remarried from previous poor choices.
  • Divorce is hard and messy, I’ll just suffer through until one of us dies.
  • We have both wounded each other deeply and both found ourselves in need of impossible forgiveness and the redemption Christ has shown His church. We submit ourselves wholly to God and His Word.
  • His unwillingness to deal with porn addiction, the lies & unwillingness to address depression, etc over time are the reason. I still want a Biblical marriage & redemption but have done all I can. It is up to him to submit to God changing him.
  • He cheated in a gang bang with 2 hookers…then high mileage lap dances in Las Vegas.

Men’s Comments:

  • How can any man stay when sex has been almost nonexistent and good sex has NEVER existed? Kids are grown. I feel like I have suffered enough. No man gets married expecting NO SEX!
  • I have been in a clinically sexless marriage for the past 20 years. It has been almost 3 years since we last had any sexual contact and I don’t see that changing. For the past month or so, I have taken a hard look at my contribution to the situation and I’ve committed to myself to fix my part of it. I am doing this because it is the right thing to do and I honestly expect nothing to change other than how I feel about it. Where I am at now is thinking that if a friend of mine came to me and described my situation, my advice would be to file. It is much more difficult to act on that thought than to give it.
  • Separated for 3 years but shell not divorce me.
  • Divorce is not an option for us.
  • We’ve just come through the hardest and most challenging year of our 38 year marriage. We’ve worked really hard, spent hours and hours in counseling. And we have a brand new and awesome marriage! I love my wife.
  • She loves me, but obviously hasn’t liked me in probably a decade. If We weren’t Christians I think we’d already be divorced.
  • My Christian wife has left me for a non-believer. It hurts.
  • There are some uncomfortable dynamics in our relationship, in some ways my wife is less verbal about them than me, but we both never see divorce as a option, although separation is not unscriptural, if necessary.
  • There could be a chance as my wife deals with anxiety and depression. She’s threatened divorce two times before and has not rescinded the statement.
  • It’s up to her, I have no say in the decision.
  • It helps when you marry your best friend.
  • I have SSA issues and have been working very hard to earn her trust. I very much value the generous wife blog. Thanks for the great ideas.
  • As far as is possible from my side, we will still be together.
  • No way, Jose!
  • We have always viewed marriage as a lifelong commitment. Divorce is NOT an option.
  • Divorce is not an option. That He hates divorce, For it covers one’s garment with violence,” Says the Lord of hosts. “Therefore take heed to your spirit, That you do not deal treacherously.” Malachi 2:16 NKJV
  • We’ve been married 38+ years and she knows all about me. And, I know all about her. She would like me to change some things and I would like her to change some things, but at this point, it’s not going to happen. So, why start over?
  • A year ago I would have answered that we had no chance and that we would definitely be divorced.
  • I am one of the lucky few to be married to his best friend and soulmate. I experience an improvement in the quality of our marriage over the past 9 years.
  • I am sick of a woman that has not a sex drive.
  • The word Divorce in not is not a part of our marriage, never has and never will.
  • God willing!
  • We are not in love anymore we spoke openly about it and both admitted that we are not in love with each other.
  • Wife emotionally abusive

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